


Hold Me Tight

by punkteddybear



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: ???? is that a tag, Angst, Daddy Issues, Fluff, French, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, It is now, M/M, Multi, OT4, Other, Panic Attack, Polyamory, genderqueer lafayette, non-binary Lafayette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-09
Updated: 2016-07-09
Packaged: 2018-07-22 11:27:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7435787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/punkteddybear/pseuds/punkteddybear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John's dad is being an asshole. Tears and cuddles ensue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hold Me Tight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [barricadebastard](https://archiveofourown.org/users/barricadebastard/gifts).



> written for lafeyettes_baguette who requested: "john being upset by his dick father and being comforted by the hamilsquad?"
> 
> French Translations:  
> mon étoile: my star  
> Il peut se faire foutre: He can go fuck himself  
> mon cher: my dear  
> si je n’étais pas là, vous mourriez tous: if I wasn't here, you would all die  
> brillant: glistening

“I hate him,” John ground out. He was sitting on the couch with Lafayette and Hercules on either side of him. Lafayette grasped John’s shaking hands while Hercules tucked a blanket around his shoulders.

“We know,  _ mon étoile _ ,” Lafayette soothed, practically cooing. “ _ Il peut se faire foutre _ .”

John didn’t reply for a moment, only continued relentlessly chewing on his bottom lip before taking a shaking breath and speaking. “I just wish he didn’t get to me so much. I’m in another state. Fuck, I haven’t even  _ seen _ him since I left for college. Why can’t I just ignore him?” Tears sprung to his eyes and he rubbed them away furiously, “I’m so fucking pathetic.”

Hercules was quick to assure him, “Him getting under your skin doesn’t make you weak or pathetic. It just makes him a manipulative bastard.” The last part was practically a growl, and Hercules’ deep voice would have been intimidating if he wasn’t currently wrapped around John like a very muscular koala.

Lafayette carefully got up, planting a kiss on John’s head, then went into the kitchen. “I’ll make you some tea. Tea fixes everything.”

“For a French person, you act pretty British sometimes,” John quipped, mustering a small smile as Lafayette rolled his eyes.

 

…

 

Alex sat alone in the library, surrounded by stacks of books that obscured the rest of the library from his view. His phone buzzed for a second time, and whatever fragment of concentration Alex had been clinging to shattered. He huffed and stuck a purple sticky note shaped like an arrow to mark his place  – an otherwise imperceptible spot amidst a sea of tiny print  – before picking up his phone.

**Mulligay:** Come home

**Mulligay:** SOS

**Ham:** what’s wrong???

**Ham:** ??????

**Ham:** HERC?????

**Mulligay:** Alex chill

**Mulligay:** It’s John’s dad again

**Mulligay:** Just come home

**Mulligay:** He always calms down with you

**Ham:** omw

He was halfway out the library door when he realized he’d left all his things on the table.

 

…

 

“John? Where’s John?” Alex barged in and threw his bag on the ground, his nose running from the cold outside.

Lafayette rushed over, carefully maneuvering the mug in their hand so hot tea didn’t spill everywhere. “Alex,  _ mon cher _ , where are your gloves? Your fingers will freeze.”

“Didn’t bring them,” Alex leaped over the couch and enveloped John in a hug.

“I swear,  _ si je n’étais pas là, vous mourriez tous _ ,” Lafayette sighed, putting the mug on the beat up coffee table and carefully sitting next to the tangle of John and Alex’s arms and legs.

“Alex, I’m fine,” John groaned, sniffling as Alex kissed his cheeks. “Seriously. You didn’t need to leave the library.”

“Except I did. Because your dad’s being a dick again, and you’re crying.” Alex carefully wiped his thumbs under John’s eyes, brushing away the few tears that had spilled there. John only shrugged, embarrassed by his vulnerability and frustrated because he knew better than to let his dad get under his skin. “Babe, do you want to go into your room?” Alex asked gently. John nodded almost imperceptibly in reply, and whispered, “Just the two of us?”

“Just the two of us,” Alex nodded.

John turned to Lafayette, chewing nervously on his lip. “I just...need Alex right now. I’m sorry.”

“ _ Bien sur _ ,” Lafayette assured their boyfriend. “I understand.”

Alex helped John get up off the couch, and led John to his bedroom. John trudged to his bed, carefully sitting down on it as Alex shut the door with a soft click.

“What’s up?” He tried to ask nonchalantly, but he couldn’t hide his worried expression.

John took a shaking breath and picked his cuticles, tears once again pooling in his eyes,. “My dad.”

Alex nodded, pulling his boyfriend closer to him and planting a careful kiss to his wild curls. “I know. What did he do?” When John’s only reply was a sharp intake of breath, Alex quickly assured, “You don’t have to talk about it.”

“He’s just such a homophobic ass. And it’s just getting worse. It’s like he knows who I am, my sexuality and my relationship with you guys. Like he’s deliberately stretching me until I snap, and then he manages to make my life a living hell from almost a thousand miles away, and I won’t be able to see any of you again, ever again and-” John cut himself off, his breath escalating into hyperventilation, his eyes wide and unblinking. He was panicking, his mind was racing, he couldn’t focus, couldn’t think  – all he could feel was a tightness in his chest, a horror that curled in his stomach because he couldn’t lose Alex, Laf, or Herc, he couldn’t lose them-

“John.” Alex’s voice seemed to grab hold of his thoughts flying in all different directions and pull them back into his head, back where they belonged. “It’s okay. You’re okay. Your dad doesn’t know.”

John buried his face against Alex’s shoulder and allowed himself to cry freely. He felt steady arms wrap around him and pull him close, holding tight despite the sobs that wracked his entire body.

“It’s okay. You’re okay. Just breathe, can you do that for me? Slow breaths, as slow as possible. Look at me John,” Alex coaxed the man to face him. “Breathe in.. breathe out.”

John followed the rhythm of Alex’s breathing, coughing and sniffling occasionally, but slowly evening his breaths into a calmer pace. Once he was no longer shaking, Alex cupped John’s face in his hands and brought their foreheads together. “It’s going to be okay,” he whispered, and kissed John on the nose.

“It’s going to be okay,” John repeated quietly, and allowed himself to sink into Alex’s arms.

After a few moments of silence, a timid knock sounded at the bedroom door. “John? Can we come in?” Hercules asked softly, the deepness of his voice contrasting oddly with his quiet tone.

Alex looked at John, eyebrows raised, and when John nodded he replied “Come in.”

The door opened and Lafayette made a beeline for the bed, Hercules following at a more controlled pace behind them.

“ _ Mon étoile _ , do not cry,” Lafayette frowned when they saw the tear tracks that stained John’s cheeks. “Your father is awful, yes, but you shine so much brighter than the darkness that he spreads. You are so brilliant John, you are  _ brillant _ , you are wonderful and I refuse to let that man make you think otherwise.”

John didn’t say a word, choosing instead to wrap his arms around Lafayette’s waist and pull them down onto the bed, knocking Alex over in the process. Hercules was quick to join the newly-formed cuddle pile and wormed his way in between Lafayette and John.

“Herc, I love you man,” John grinned, “but it’s time for you to accept that at 6 feet tall, it’s impossible for you to be the little spoon.”

Hercules just huffed and wriggled his broad shoulders around to force the others to give him more room. “Just watch me, Laurens.”

Alex lazily swung his arm across John’s chest as Lafayette curled in towards Hercules. All four men gravitated toward each other on the bed, slowly tangling their limbs together. After a few minutes of silence, John’s voice timidly broke the quiet. “I love you.” The gentle kisses and hand squeezes that followed were the only responses he needed.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll probably end up making this into a series of some sort, but no promises. Feel free to leave feedback in the comments below! tumblr is punkteddybear


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